His ‘n’ Hers

Relationship strife – we have all had it – whether you are wildly happily married, single and wondering whether you will ever settle down, or bitterly resigned to just battling on, we have all been there.

Apparently you are statistically most likely to be murdered in your own bedroom… Scary, I can remember watching relationaship expert and psychiatrist, RD Laing being interviewed and him saying that you are safer wandering the streets of Los Angeles than sitting in your bedroom… Oh dear – I do hope the arguments are not about interior design.

There can surely be no longer running battleground than the marital bedroom – who decides on the duvet? The cover? The bed itself, the wardrobe solutions… and then you have to reassess these decisions every time you move, jointly…


In our house we have always really gone with what Doug wants – unusual, I suspect, I always imagine a lot of men don’t care and that Doug is unusually interested in cushions and duvet covers… Luckily, I do quite like his taste and I do trust him, sort of. In most homes, is it not the wife making these choices though? Or are we all metrosexual now and making these choices together?

'Graffiti Birch' cushions

We needed something to finish off our bedroom so Doug chose these Arlo & Jacob – the ‘Graffiti Birch’. Gorgeous, in a chic, minimal, ‘texture is the new colour’ kind of way – he loves them and they are perfect for the masculine, bachelor pad style he favours.


Right, let’s get to the honest bit – actually I can’t bear the way we always have to go with what Doug wants – it drives me mad and I try and get my way as often as I can – slipping in purple walls here, some lovely blinds there…


Would soooo love this beautiful sofa in our bedroom for instance, the Mowbray in Boyseberry, also by Arlo & Jacob, rather than the severe metal Marcel Breuer chair.

If Doug had his way, our house would be like a swedish prison- I have told him that and he googled Swedish prisons on the internet and showed me saying -‘look they’re really nice….’ Aargh!!! It is an eternal problem for us and there is nowhere it gets knottier than in our bedroom… I would basically like a sea of purple cushions on a pink upholstered bed, while he wants a minimalist bachelor pad. Our eureka moment – will it be a marriage saver? I hope so – was when we realised that the layout of our house cried out for a bedroom with an adjoining dressing room. A dressing room is a dream of mine and I said ‘Doug, you can have the bedroom’!


So here I am, surrounded by shoes, bags, baskets, usually a pile of stuff on the floor as well – heaven!

wide corner

While he can quietly contemplate in his monk-like bedroom…

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